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"The TA complains I give you too much homework. I say, give them all zeros, easier to grade"
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Dr. Sengoda Ganesan, MEE 331
Northern Illinois University, DeKalb, Illinois
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Comments? Add
or View (12)
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submitted: March 9, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"I am going to Dr. Miller, and say, 'you have Denis in your class. Flunk his ass!'"
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Dr. Sengoda Ganesan, MEE 220
Northern Illinois University, DeKalb, Illinois
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 9, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"We chop carrots, we put in pot, we make cake"
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Dr. Sengoda Ganesan, MEE 330
Northern Illinois University, DeKalb, Illinois
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Comments? Add
or View (2)
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submitted: March 9, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"You are the dumbest student I have ever had."
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Dr. Sengoda Ganesan, MEE 220
Northern Illinois University, DeKalb, Illinois
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Comments? Add
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submitted: March 9, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"Addition, subtraction, multiplication, division, they've always been functions we just didn't tell you in fourth grade because we did not want you to suicide!"
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Dr. Spina, Calculus 1300
University of Colorado, Boulder, CO
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 6, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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My father told me once: A man should count until 10 before he says something. You, Hochberg, my son, should count until 100 and not say.
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Prof. Avraham Hochberg, Biochemistry
Hebrew University, Jerusalem, Israel
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 5, 2005 |
The troubling thing is - did his father really call him by his last name?... By the way, it didn't really help - He still says the most un-politically-correct things.
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| Rating: unrated |
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Are you sure grapefruits are not green?...
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Prof. Hagai Bergman,
Hebrew University, Jerusalem, Israel
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Comments? Add
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submitted: March 5, 2005 |
While asking a student of his to get him a grapefruit juice fron the cafeteria.
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| Rating: unrated |
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"Victor Hugo has a line that reads something like 'Never insult a lady when she falls', whereas Baudelaire would be like 'Trip the bitch!'"
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Laura Penny, Foundation Year Programme
University of King's College, Halifax, NS
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 5, 2005 |
Best. Baudelaire. Lecture. Ever.
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| Rating: 9.5 |
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"if you write about sex and fornication, then you'll get an 'A'."
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Dr. Ernest Fontana, Intro to Poetry
Xavier University, Cincinnati, OH
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 4, 2005 |
I asked Fontana how to do better in his class, after receiving a 20% on my first paper, and he told me that. I refused and got a low grade.
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| Rating: unrated |
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The only way to get good at something is by doing it, not by watching. For instance, you can't become a good lover by watching X-rated movies.
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Dave Pray, Engineering Statistics - MA3710
Michigan Technological University, Houghton, Michigan
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 4, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"You do not want to put your mouth over a cow's behind."
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Mr. D, Math Six
Ossining High School, Ossining, NY
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 3, 2005 |
(Talking about methane gas.)
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| Rating: unrated |
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That amount of cash makes diarrhea worth doing.
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Alex John London, Research Ethics
Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 3, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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If I had to be crushed to death, it would be under a crate of hot pants from Indonesia.
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Alex John London, Research Ethics
Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 3, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"Less talking more typing"
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Mr. McCabe, Information Technology
WACTC, Woonsocket, RI
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 1, 2005 |
Said when it gets a little chatty in Information Technology.
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| Rating: 1 |
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Dog bites man -- not a story!
Man bites dog -- now that's a story!
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Alex John London, Research Ethics
Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA
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Comments? Add
or View (4)
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submitted: February 27, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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People need to be more like dishes. And we know, after years of experience, that people are nothing, nothing like dishes.
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Alex John London, Research Ethics
Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: February 27, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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How big is big? Well, practically speaking, big is what you got.
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Christopher Cornwell, Econometrics
University of Georgia, ,
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: February 27, 2005 |
Response to a question about what sample size is needed for asymptotic properties to hold
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| Rating: unrated |
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Euclid said there are infinitely many prime numbers. He proved it. I checked the proof.
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Laszlo Babai, Algorithms
University of Chicago, Chicago, IL
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: February 26, 2005 |
Prefaced by a rant along the lines of "If a politician says something, it's probably false. A philosopher says something, who knows? A physicist says something, in a hundred years we might know if it's true. But a mathematician..."
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| Rating: 10 |
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There are many ways you can do it. Some are easy, some are not. Some are more fun than others...umm...(long pause) what was the question?
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Alan Litchfield, Database Management
AUT, Auckland,
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: February 26, 2005 |
| Rating: 10 |
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A thinko. It's a typo in your brain.
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Ian Proops, Intro Philosophy
University of Michigan, Ann Arbor, MI
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: February 25, 2005 |
| Rating: 7 |
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If you scored a 0 on the midterm, do not worry. The class average was 2, so you are not very far off.
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, CIS400
Syracuse University, Syracuse, NY
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Comments? Add
or View (2)
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submitted: February 23, 2005 |
The maximum grade was 10 points.
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| Rating: 10 |
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Let me let you in on a little secret. I wear Hanes underwear.
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Dr. Arnett Gaston, CCJS 100
University of Maryland, College Park, MD
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Comments? Add
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submitted: February 21, 2005 |
| Rating: 10 |
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Somewhere in an icehouse in the mountains of West Virginia, my uncle's flatulence lives on.
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Doctor John Ellis, World History and Food
University of Michigan - Flint, Flint, MI
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Comments? Add
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submitted: February 21, 2005 |
Desribing how his uncle took advantage of the fact that ice houses (used for the seasonal storing of ice before refridgeration) have no incoming or out going air.
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| Rating: 9 |
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Nazism is Spike TV gone awry...Nascar dads with high-powered rifles! -well, we already have them.
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Professor Greg Eghigian, History 143: Fascism and Nazism in the Third Reich
Penn State, University Park, PA
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Comments? Add
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submitted: February 19, 2005 |
Regarding the hyper-masculine qualities of Nazi ideology.
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| Rating: unrated |
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Serendipity: It's better to be smart and lucky than dumb and unlucky.
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Mr. Valse, Biology I Honors
Lake Central High School, St. John, Indiana
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: February 18, 2005 |
So true, so true.
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| Rating: unrated |
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