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Jump to page:
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"Absolute value is forbidden. Absolute value is a pointy thing. Math people don't like pointy things. So what do we do. We smooth it!"
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Dr. M. V. Moorthy, MA115- Statistics 1
Boston University, Boston, MA
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Comments? Add
or View (2)
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submitted: December 10, 2005 |
Why we don't use absolute value the chi squared test....
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| Rating: unrated |
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Old Norse- I'm teaching a language course that you can take so you can learn to speak like an elf.
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Dr. Lee Fratantuono, Myth, Legend, and Folklore
Ohi Wesleyan University, Delaware, OH
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Comments? Add
or View (1)
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submitted: December 8, 2005 |
In reference to Norse mythology
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| Rating: 10 |
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I don't know how you are with your recreational drugs, but I know for me, a change in the mixture is often required at the end of the semester
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Dr. Sharon Johnson, Admin Policy and Strategy
Cedarville, Cedarville, OH
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: December 8, 2005 |
| Rating: 10 |
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For a change why don't you 'come-on' to me?
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Shamim Idris,
Lawrence School, Sanawar, , HP
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submitted: December 8, 2005 |
In reply to a girl in the class who always said "Oh, come on...", when he announced his notorious surprise tests.
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| Rating: unrated |
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Don't jump! It's not worth it! Besides, we're on the first floor.
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David Massey, Calculus II
Northeastern University, Boston, MA
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submitted: December 7, 2005 |
Said when the professor saw the student leaning out the window to prop it open with a book.
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| Rating: 10 |
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If you want to have sex, just add another table.
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Joel Weinstein,
Northeastern University, Boston, MA
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: December 7, 2005 |
When talking about loading databases into memory.
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| Rating: unrated |
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"Wow, teaching out of the book is quite easy, maybe I should do it more often!"
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Dr. Sengoda Ganesan, MEE 220
Northern Illinois University, ,
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submitted: December 6, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"If you are smart, you might be able to cheat Ganesan. If you are not so smart, Ganesan will let you slide by."
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Dr. Sengoda Ganesan, MEE 220
Northern Illinois University, DeKalb, IL
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Comments? Add
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submitted: December 6, 2005 |
On up comming test
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| Rating: unrated |
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You got your four food groups: Beer, toilet paper, and cigarettes.
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Dr. Michael Dzanko, Comp 101
Ashland University, Ashland, Ohio
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submitted: December 5, 2005 |
He was talking about how old people were complaining in his home town that the college students don't contribute to the local economy.
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| Rating: unrated |
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So, what do you obtain when you have a chain of a baryum atom and two sodium atoms? A snack.
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Dr. Lynn Myhichuk, Chem 102
University of Regina, Regina, SK
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Comments? Add
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submitted: December 5, 2005 |
BaNaNa --> Periodic symbols for these two elements...
Loved this prof!
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| Rating: 10 |
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"You have all seen the commercial for viagra right? We you know how they have that disclaimer that says if you have an erection for more than 48 hours see a doctor? I know all the guys right now are thinking to themselves, ohh thats easy, I can do that, but I've got news for you: that's what we call an outlier!"
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Mr. DiCarlucci, AP Statistics
Ossining High School, Ossining, NY
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Comments? Add
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submitted: December 5, 2005 |
The coolest teacher in the world
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| Rating: unrated |
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Sometimes your looking so hard for the bird you just miss the fish
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Luthold, ad 301
northren michigan U, marquette, MI
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Comments? Add
or View (2)
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submitted: December 5, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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Acording to Aquinas you shouldnt really feel pain. for example lets say im in a parking garage and someone took a bat out of their car and BAM hit me right in the knee. and i go HA! little did he know i was on oppium, horine, crack, pot, codine...
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, Philosophy 101
, ,
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Comments? Add
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submitted: December 4, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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And I'll leave this as an exercise that I know no one is going to do-- but it gets it off my conscience.
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Dr. John Beachy, 620 Topics in Algebra: Homological Algebra
Northern Illinois University, DeKalb, IL
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Comments? Add
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submitted: December 3, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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Someone asked me what we eat in Turkey for Thanksgiving. He was an idiot, so I told him, "Americans."
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Vehbi Paksoy, Calculus II
Pomona College, Claremont, CA
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Comments? Add
or View (2)
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submitted: December 3, 2005 |
He's Turkish.
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| Rating: 10 |
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"Michelangelo liked to paint and sculpt the mucsular male nude, and I wont go into detail as to why, and Titian preferred redish/blonde women. If Titian were here today he'd probably hit on you."
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George H. Cassar, Western Civilization to 1647 (101)
Eastern Michigan University, Ypsilanti, Michigan
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Comments? Add
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submitted: December 2, 2005 |
Lecturing to the class on artists, then turning to a light red headed girl in the frton row for the latter statement. Think of the awkwardness of being semi hit on by a 70+ year old prof.
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| Rating: 10 |
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Cassar: "The Mona Lisa, and I don't mean the popular song. ANy of you know who sang that? One of my favourite singers. You might know his daughter. you know people always say to her 'You sing well, but not as well as your father.' Anyone know who I'm talking about?"
Student 1: "Elvis Presley?"
Cassar: "No, no, I'm not fond of Elvis at all"
Student 2: "Led Zeppilin."
Cassar: "Nope, hahaha, Try again"
Student 3: "Nat King Cole"
Cassar: "That'a girl!"
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George H. Cassar, Western Civilization to 1647 (101)
Eastern Michigan University, Ypsilanti, Michigan
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: December 2, 2005 |
| Rating: 2 |
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"If there ever was a great waste of time and manpower, it would have to be the pyramids. One wonders what on earth they were thinkign when they built those"
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George H. Cassar, Western Civilization to 1647 (101)
Eastern Michigan University, Ypsilanti, Michigan
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Comments? Add
or View (4)
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submitted: December 2, 2005 |
| Rating: 3 |
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"It's sad that when we talk about the Madonna people nowadays don't think of the Virgin Mary but of the sleezey no good pop singer"
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George H. Cassar, Western Civilization to 1647 (101)
Eastern Michigan University, Ypsilanti, Michigan
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: December 2, 2005 |
| Rating: 6 |
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Student:"This is exciting"
Prof:"Wow, if this excites you then you have had a really boring life"
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Prof. Maricak, Vis Com
Lawrence Tech, Southfeild, MI
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Comments? Add
or View (3)
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submitted: December 1, 2005 |
| Rating: 7.5 |
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Alcohol preserves the brain. Need I say more?
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Professor Marian Diamond, Human Anatomy
UC Berkeley, Berkeley, CA
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Comments? Add
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submitted: November 30, 2005 |
Prof. Diamond holding a preserved brain in front of the class.
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| Rating: unrated |
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I'm very sorry andrew, but I'm not going to apologise.
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Mr Rushworth, History
Queen Mary's Grammar, Walsall,
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submitted: November 30, 2005 |
| Rating: 1 |
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"It is implicitly obvious to even the most casual observer."
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Mr. Cotner, Calc 1
Salem High School, Canton, MI
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Comments? Add
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submitted: November 30, 2005 |
He always said this before filling two chalkboards with inane gibberish.
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| Rating: 1 |
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"Being from England, I'm always suprised we never used the English units of measure or whatever they're called. Except for pints. We like pints."
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Alan Struthers, Caculus 2
Michigan Tech, Houghton, MI
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: November 30, 2005 |
| Rating: unrated |
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Dark matter? It just sits there, gravitating.
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Professor Robin Ball, Physics
University Of Warwick, ,
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: November 29, 2005 |
| Rating: 8 |
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