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"If we don't have laws of inheritance, old people will do really crazy things." (March 2)
On feudalism: "Back then, they knew how to use their hands. Today, it's just click, click, click." (Apr 7)
On Brown v. Voss: "Are there any psychopaths involved in this case? How many did you count? Most litigators say you have to have four to get to the state supreme court - the two parties, and their lawyers." (April 20)
"I've never met anyone who had a theory of life. Maybe I just move in the wrong circles." (April 29)
Robert Ellickson, Property Law
Yale University Law School, ,

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: March 1, 2003

some of the funniest parts of a very un-funny and depressing experience: law school.
Rating: unrated

When I say to my husband that I can't cook because I have a whole bunch of grading to do... he doesn't have to know.
Laurie White, Theory of Computing
Mercer University, Macon, GA

Comments? Add or View (3) submitted: March 1, 2003

On star-closure, which can represent any number of occurrences of a string, including none at all.
Rating: unrated

"Though it isn't the most cost-effective major you could chose, you can say one thing about being an English major: it can teach you what it means to be alive."
Professor Mary Gordon, Death in the Modern Novel
Barnard College, New York, NY

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: March 1, 2003
Rating: unrated

When asked how long our papers should be, our professor replied 'Just like a girl's skirt -- long enough to cover everything essential, short enough to keep it interesting.'
,
Drury College, Springfield, MO

Comments? Add or View (4) submitted: March 1, 2003
Rating: 10

"Won't the real juvenile please stand up, please stand up, please stand up...?"
Diane Johnson, Greek Lit
Western Washingotn University, Bellingham, Wash.

Comments? Add or View (8) submitted: March 1, 2003

she was trying to make a point about the duplicitous nature of some characters. the class wasn't sure at first if she had intended this as a joke; then everyone burst out laughing at once.
Rating: unrated

"My name is Ned Markosian.. you spell it just like it's pronounced... Ned..."
Ned Narkosian, Intro to Logic (Philosophy)
Western Washington University, Bellingham, Wash.

Comments? Add or View (2) submitted: March 1, 2003

he gave this joke on the first day of every class.
Rating: unrated

Once, I was playing tennis with a friend of mine, and he went for the ball and fell down. I poked him with my racket and then I realised he had a brain aneurysm and was dead.
Prof. Brawn, Introduction to Legal Studies
Laurentian University, Sudbury, Ontario

Comments? Add or View (2) submitted: March 1, 2003

My first year Law professor dropped this in the middle of a completely unrelated lecture. He didn't laugh or crack a smile, and the rest of the class was left wondering "Ummm, is he serious?"
Rating: unrated

If you want to assassinate Castro, then you put LSD into his cigars.
Robert Cavalier, Introduction to Ethics
Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: March 1, 2003

A fine example of a hypothetical imperative...
Rating: unrated

"I am the lord of all that is fly."
Mr. Bruzzo, AP English Lit
Valley Stream South High School, , NY

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: March 1, 2003

<--the class had been talking about "Lord of the Flies," of course.
Rating: unrated

Oh, A question. I love Questions. I am teacher I answer them for a living and I m quite good at it if I do say so myself.... and I do.
Brother Joe Lebon, Latin
Archbishop Hoban High School, Akron, OH

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: March 1, 2003
Rating: 10

"The New York Philharmonic is just New York City taxi cab drivers with instruments in their hands."
Maestro Russell Stanger, NYSSSA School of Orchestral Studies
, ,

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: March 1, 2003
Rating: unrated

"I don't know all your names so well, I'm sorry, it's because I don't eat with you, I don't sleep with you... No no no, you know what I mean."
Maestro Russell Stanger, NYSSSA School of Orchestral Studies
, ,

Comments? Add or View (3) submitted: March 1, 2003
Rating: 8

Nothing difficult - we're just defining things as we go along.
Sharma, Physics
UTA, Arlington, TX

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: March 1, 2003

Teaching the section and doing a massive example. All at once! Whee!
Rating: unrated

- "Ok, so you've seen me do it the sensible way; now I'm going to do it an utterly insane way."
Dr Frank King, Computing for Natural Scientists
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: March 2, 2003

This was referring to calculating (2^i)/100).
Rating: unrated

"...and the University loves its clock so much that they employ a person to look after it - and that person is meeeeee !!"
Dr Frank King, Computing for Natural Scientists
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK

Comments? Add or View (3) submitted: March 2, 2003

We were meant to be modelling a pendulum...
Rating: unrated

"I could go on and on telling you about clocks but I shall resist the temptation."
Dr Frank King, Computing for Natural Scientists
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: March 2, 2003

Frank King - legendary.
Rating: unrated

"So here we have pi squared, which an engineer would call 10..."
Dr Frank King, Computing for Natural Scientists
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: March 2, 2003
Rating: 10

"...and make sure it's your array; you should never fiddle with other people's arrays..."
Professor Larry Paulson, Software Engineering II
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: March 2, 2003
Rating: unrated

"If you're a C programmer, you'll be fine with this; if you're a mathematician, this will make you ill."
Professor Larry Paulson, Software Engineering II
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK

Comments? Add or View (2) submitted: March 2, 2003

Referring to the side effect of the boolean 'expression' (x++ < 5).
Rating: unrated

"So don't they teach you Fortran in Natsci these days ?"
Professor Larry Paulson, Software Engineering II
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: March 2, 2003

In Cambridge, Natural Science is that catch-all subject for any science that is not Computer Science (to a pretty good approximation).
Rating: unrated

"CONTINUE is the Fortran statement for do nothing and go on. It got left out of most other languages."
Professor Larry Paulson, Software Engineering II
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK

Comments? Add or View (3) submitted: March 2, 2003
Rating: 1

Architecture may not be the world's oldest profession, but it has a number of things in common with the world's oldest. Namely, all the amatures, think they know more than the professionals.
Professor Joseph Shelley, History of Architecture
Columbia University, New York, NY

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: March 2, 2003

My favorite professor
Rating: unrated

I am the author of many highly disregarded articles.
Dr. Donald Bersoff, Law and Psychology Program
Villanova Law Scool, Villanova, PA

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: March 2, 2003
Rating: unrated

"If it takes you two hours to watch 60 Minutes, you DON'T want to take this course!"
"if yu think Roe v. Wade is the decision Washington made before crossing the Delaware, you DON'T want to take this course!"
"If you think Joan of Ark was Noah's wife, you DON'T want to take this course!"
"If you think the Presidents on Mt. Rushmore is a natural phenomenon, you DON'T want to take this course!"
"If you think the Gettysburg Address is where Abe Lincoln lived, you certainly DON'T want to take this course!"
"If you believed two or more of the examples given, you're already up to you ass in alligators, and SHOULD LEAVE NOW WHILE YOU STILL CAN!
Dr. George A. Levesque, The Slavery Experience in America
SUNY: University Center @ Albany, Albany, NY

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: March 2, 2003

This was the professor's opening day lecture in a class with some 60 students registered; when about half the class walked out returning the course syllabus to the instructor as they departed, he looked at those of usremainilng and said: "Now that we have gotten rid of the dross, let's get down to the serious business of learning.
Rating: 9.5

"He who knows only his own country, will never know his own country."
George Levesque, American Slavery
University Center at Albany, Albany, NY

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: March 2, 2003

During a discussion on the importance of seeing American slavery in a New World (hemispheric) context.
Rating: unrated

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