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Jump to page:
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"Though it isn't the most cost-effective major you could chose, you can say one thing about being an English major: it can teach you what it means to be alive."
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Professor Mary Gordon, Death in the Modern Novel
Barnard College, New York, NY
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Comments? Add
or View (1)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
| Rating: unrated |
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When asked how long our papers should be, our professor replied 'Just like a girl's skirt -- long enough to cover everything essential, short enough to keep it interesting.'
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,
Drury College, Springfield, MO
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Comments? Add
or View (4)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
| Rating: 10 |
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"Won't the real juvenile please stand up, please stand up, please stand up...?"
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Diane Johnson, Greek Lit
Western Washingotn University, Bellingham, Wash.
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Comments? Add
or View (8)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
she was trying to make a point about the duplicitous nature of some characters. the class wasn't sure at first if she had intended this as a joke; then everyone burst out laughing at once.
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| Rating: unrated |
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"My name is Ned Markosian.. you spell it just like it's pronounced... Ned..."
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Ned Narkosian, Intro to Logic (Philosophy)
Western Washington University, Bellingham, Wash.
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Comments? Add
or View (2)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
he gave this joke on the first day of every class.
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| Rating: unrated |
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Once, I was playing tennis with a friend of mine, and he went for the ball and fell down. I poked him with my racket and then I realised he had a brain aneurysm and was dead.
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Prof. Brawn, Introduction to Legal Studies
Laurentian University, Sudbury, Ontario
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Comments? Add
or View (2)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
My first year Law professor dropped this in the middle of a completely unrelated lecture. He didn't laugh or crack a smile, and the rest of the class was left wondering "Ummm, is he serious?"
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| Rating: unrated |
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If you want to assassinate Castro, then you put LSD into his cigars.
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Robert Cavalier, Introduction to Ethics
Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
A fine example of a hypothetical imperative...
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| Rating: unrated |
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"I am the lord of all that is fly."
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Mr. Bruzzo, AP English Lit
Valley Stream South High School, , NY
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Comments? Add
or View (1)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
<--the class had been talking about "Lord of the Flies," of course.
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| Rating: unrated |
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Oh, A question. I love Questions. I am teacher I answer them for a living and I m quite good at it if I do say so myself.... and I do.
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Brother Joe Lebon, Latin
Archbishop Hoban High School, Akron, OH
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Comments? Add
or View (1)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
| Rating: 10 |
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"The New York Philharmonic is just New York City taxi cab drivers with instruments in their hands."
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Maestro Russell Stanger, NYSSSA School of Orchestral Studies
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Comments? Add
or View (1)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"I don't know all your names so well, I'm sorry, it's because I don't eat with you, I don't sleep with you... No no no, you know what I mean."
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Maestro Russell Stanger, NYSSSA School of Orchestral Studies
, ,
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Comments? Add
or View (3)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
| Rating: 8 |
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Nothing difficult - we're just defining things as we go along.
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Sharma, Physics
UTA, Arlington, TX
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
Teaching the section and doing a massive example. All at once! Whee!
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| Rating: unrated |
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- "Ok, so you've seen me do it the sensible way; now I'm going to do it an utterly insane way."
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Dr Frank King, Computing for Natural Scientists
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK
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Comments? Add
or View (1)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
This was referring to calculating (2^i)/100).
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| Rating: unrated |
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"...and the University loves its clock so much that they employ a person to look after it - and that person is meeeeee !!"
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Dr Frank King, Computing for Natural Scientists
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK
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Comments? Add
or View (3)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
We were meant to be modelling a pendulum...
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| Rating: unrated |
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"I could go on and on telling you about clocks but I shall resist the temptation."
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Dr Frank King, Computing for Natural Scientists
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
Frank King - legendary.
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| Rating: unrated |
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"So here we have pi squared, which an engineer would call 10..."
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Dr Frank King, Computing for Natural Scientists
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
| Rating: 10 |
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"...and make sure it's your array; you should never fiddle with other people's arrays..."
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Professor Larry Paulson, Software Engineering II
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"If you're a C programmer, you'll be fine with this; if you're a mathematician, this will make you ill."
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Professor Larry Paulson, Software Engineering II
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK
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Comments? Add
or View (2)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
Referring to the side effect of the boolean 'expression' (x++ < 5).
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| Rating: unrated |
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"So don't they teach you Fortran in Natsci these days ?"
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Professor Larry Paulson, Software Engineering II
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
In Cambridge, Natural Science is that catch-all subject for any science that is not Computer Science (to a pretty good approximation).
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| Rating: unrated |
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"CONTINUE is the Fortran statement for do nothing and go on. It got left out of most other languages."
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Professor Larry Paulson, Software Engineering II
Cambridge University, Cambridge, UK
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Comments? Add
or View (3)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
| Rating: unrated |
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Architecture may not be the world's oldest profession, but it has a number of things in common with the world's oldest. Namely, all the amatures, think they know more than the professionals.
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Professor Joseph Shelley, History of Architecture
Columbia University, New York, NY
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 1, 2003 |
My favorite professor
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| Rating: unrated |
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I am the author of many highly disregarded articles.
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Dr. Donald Bersoff, Law and Psychology Program
Villanova Law Scool, Villanova, PA
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Comments? Add
or View (1)
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submitted: March 2, 2003 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"If it takes you two hours to watch 60 Minutes, you DON'T want to take this course!"
"if yu think Roe v. Wade is the decision Washington made before crossing the Delaware, you DON'T want to take this course!"
"If you think Joan of Ark was Noah's wife, you DON'T want to take this course!"
"If you think the Presidents on Mt. Rushmore is a natural phenomenon, you DON'T want to take this course!"
"If you think the Gettysburg Address is where Abe Lincoln lived, you certainly DON'T want to take this course!"
"If you believed two or more of the examples given, you're already up to you ass in alligators, and SHOULD LEAVE NOW WHILE YOU STILL CAN!
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Dr. George A. Levesque, The Slavery Experience in America
SUNY: University Center @ Albany, Albany, NY
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Comments? Add
or View (1)
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submitted: March 2, 2003 |
This was the professor's opening day lecture in a class with some 60 students registered; when about half the class walked out returning the course syllabus to the instructor as they departed, he looked at those of usremainilng and said: "Now that we have gotten rid of the dross, let's get down to the serious business of learning.
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| Rating: 9.5 |
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"He who knows only his own country, will never know his own country."
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George Levesque, American Slavery
University Center at Albany, Albany, NY
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Comments? Add
or View (1)
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submitted: March 2, 2003 |
During a discussion on the importance of seeing American slavery in a New World (hemispheric) context.
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| Rating: unrated |
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"A mind is like a parachute: IT ONLY WORKS WHEN IT'S OPEN. As for how much time you'll be expected to devote to this course, I can only give you this experience whilch worked well for me when I was a student: 'you only have to think about this course on those days you EAT.'"
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Professor George Levesque [pronounced "Love,"/"Ach, History of American Slavery
SUNY/Albany, Albany, NY
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Comments? Add
or View (1)
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submitted: March 2, 2003 |
Responses to student questions as we looked over the 15 page syllabus for the course
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| Rating: unrated |
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"I just can't do the rape thing."
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Dr. Z, Music
Valley Stream South High School, ,
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Comments? Add
or View (0)
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submitted: March 2, 2003 |
<--explaining why our school couldn't mount a production of "Man of La Mancha." Out of context [which is how I heard it, walking into the room mid-conversation], it's priceless.
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| Rating: unrated |
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