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Jump to page:
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Arithmetic is like a bow and arrow, calculus is like a magnum. Doing this problem is like shooting a fly with a magnum!
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Dr. Manickam, MATH255
Western Carolina University, Cullowhee, North Carolina
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submitted: January 2, 2009 |
"What did you learn in math today?"
"How to shoot a fly with a gun."
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| Rating: unrated |
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Faster, deeper! Faster, deeper!!!
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Prof. Jim Pawelzyk, Exercise Phyisiology
Pennsylvania State University, University Park, PA
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submitted: January 3, 2009 |
This was a physiology party trick that our prof was doing to demonstrate hyperventilation and holding your breath. He realized what he said and started laughing hysterically.
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| Rating: 10 |
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What do you know about scalping, off the top of your...
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Hester,
School Of The Woods, Houston, Texas
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submitted: January 3, 2009 |
| Rating: unrated |
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I always thought "Backstreet Boys" was a very explicit name. I mean, what are they doing in those back streets?
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Dr. Richard Santana, Shakespeare: Comedies
Rochester Institute of Technology, Rochester, New York
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submitted: January 3, 2009 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"Its like your girlfriend saying 'I had sex with Bob...he has AIDS.'"
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Dr. Nathan Mao, Introduction to Literature
Shippensburg University, Shippensburg, Pennsylvania
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submitted: January 3, 2009 |
While we were discussing cheating in a short story.
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| Rating: unrated |
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Alright now we're going to talk about intrusive relationships, now these arn't your boyfriend girlfriend relationships we're talking about dikes.
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,
Eckerd College, ,
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submitted: January 4, 2009 |
Geology class on intrusive magmatic structures otherwise known as dikes
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| Rating: 9.33333 |
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"it's not hard to remember, just think about someone at fed-ex whose tired of his job and started doing pot..."
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Linda Hardin, Hardware 1
Caldwell Community College, Boone, NC
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submitted: January 5, 2009 |
A mental image that has never let me forget what the high loader does, Linda had a wierd sense of teaching.
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| Rating: unrated |
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Today we are going to teach you 3 ways to inflate your pants.
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Kathy Brock, PE 310
UW-Madison, Madison, WI
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submitted: January 5, 2009 |
Whenever I tell my friends about this, they always think it is something dirty, but we were learning water survival skills
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| Rating: unrated |
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Where's my stapler? I'm failing the 9 o'clock class!
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Raymond Reinertsen, HHP 102
UW-Superior, Superior, WI
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submitted: January 5, 2009 |
Luckily I was in the 1 o'clock class.
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| Rating: unrated |
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"If you ever question your identity, just stick a pencil up your nose."
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Dr. Mary Glenn, Primate Ecology
Humboldt State University, Arcata, California
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submitted: January 5, 2009 |
A primatology teacher. old world primate (like humans) have downward facing nostrils and new world primates have outward facing nostrils
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| Rating: unrated |
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this is one bad mother function!
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Nate Barlow, Differential Equations
Clarkson University, Potsdam, NY
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submitted: January 5, 2009 |
Our teacher was doing an example on the board on the board and was having touble getting it to work.
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| Rating: unrated |
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"It'll be called Drafting: The Musical"
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Steven "J" R. "Jerry Rig" Pauna, THE 202 - Intro to Stagecraft
Miami University, Oxford, Ohio
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submitted: January 5, 2009 |
The song and dance version of class.
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| Rating: unrated |
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In Algebra there are all the crazy people who take two trains and drive them towards each other... We don't have none of that kind of insanity in Calc class!
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, MATH-123
SDSM&T, ,
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submitted: January 10, 2009 |
Our Calculus 1 professor explaining the difference between Algebra and Calculus
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| Rating: unrated |
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I love Bacon!
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Prof. Arnld Bohm nicknamed 'A-Bohm', Romantics
Carleton University, Ottawa, Ontario
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submitted: January 11, 2009 |
Made with reference to Sir Francis Bacon. Close your eyes and envision possibly the most rotund and pear shaped man you've ever seen in your entire life, then add a fruity unctuous voice.
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| Rating: 1.5 |
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I assign the same questions for the take-home essay exam every semester, but if you had a relative or friend that took this course and think you can just copy theirs, don't. I have a pornographic memory.
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(Prof passed away a few years ago), Introduction to Business
Northern Kentucky University, Highland Heights, KY
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submitted: January 12, 2009 |
Freudian-slip much?
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| Rating: unrated |
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"Not only is she naked, Oh look! she's brought lunch!"
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Dr Alison Syme, European Art History of the 19th Century
University of Toronto, Mississauga Campus, Mississauga, Ontario
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submitted: January 14, 2009 |
She was talking about one of muybridges pictures and how they were made for scientific uses but sometimes there were elements that seemed not so scientific.
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| Rating: unrated |
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I believe in commas. Otherwise this sentence: "I'd like to thank my parents, Judge Judy and God." could mean you were the freak spawn of Judge Judy and God, while all you were trying to do was thank your influences and mentors.
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Mr. Frederick, AP English 11
Orchard Park High School, Orchard Park, New York
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submitted: January 15, 2009 |
| Rating: 1 |
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[Professor writes the 'Sandwich Theorem' on the overhead]: "Yes, yes, where I am from, we did not call it this. We called it the _Policeman_ Theorem, because when the police grab you, you can not escape."
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Irina Kadyrova, MTH133
MSU, Lansing, MI
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submitted: January 16, 2009 |
Our prof spoke with a think Russian accent and was from Czechoslovakia, if I remember correctly. She was an awesome Calc teacher.
...and- iirc again- the sandwich theorem says if you have a function on the graph, you can describe what it equals by having it 'sandwiched' between two other functions. It equals a number between them. (yes, this is a fairly obvious theorem)
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| Rating: 1.33333 |
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Be short and concise in your answers... no diarrhea of the pen.
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Darlene Lacharitée, Introduction to second language teaching
Université Laval, Quebec, Quebec
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submitted: January 16, 2009 |
| Rating: unrated |
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Put this in your pipe and smoke it for next week.
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Susan Harding, Anth 151
UC Santa Cruz, ,
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submitted: January 16, 2009 |
said about a handout on taking field notes
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| Rating: unrated |
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Can you imagine a giraffe with vertigo?
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Professor Todd, Biopsychology
Bridgewater State College, Bridgewater, ma
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submitted: January 17, 2009 |
| Rating: unrated |
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Well, at least I know the IB bio class of 2008 will never reproduce.
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Mrs. Wright, IB Biology 2
Schenley High School, Pittsburgh, PA
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submitted: January 17, 2009 |
In response to the class's faces after a human reproduction lesson.
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| Rating: 10 |
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5 is great, 6 is excellent, 7 is a gift from God
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B Naveh, IB History
Schenley High School, ,
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Comments? Add
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submitted: January 17, 2009 |
Explaining to us the IB scoring system
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| Rating: 10 |
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(dreamily) Like a chocolate eclair...and milk...skim! (drifts away into space)
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Dr. Mitchell, Abnormal Psych
Lycoming College, Wiliamsport, pa
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submitted: January 18, 2009 |
This was during a discussion about dopamine and how certain pleasureful things (like eclairs with skim milk).
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| Rating: unrated |
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This proof is brought to you by the magic of Technicolor®
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Prof. Simón-Romero, Real Variables I/II
Rochester Institute of Technology, Rochester, NY
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submitted: January 18, 2009 |
| Rating: unrated |
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