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I've learned never to introduce a movie as funny. I put it on and there's always a little murmer, "he thinks this is funny?" It's not funny, really. It's extremely serious.
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Dr. Harp, American History
Grove City, ,
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submitted: October 31, 2009 |
he has the driest sense of humor I have ever come across in my life
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| Rating: unrated |
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You have to come to class on Monday to find out who won.
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Dr. Harp, American History
Grove City, ,
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submitted: October 31, 2009 |
last comment as we walk out the door after talking about the American Revolution
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| Rating: 9 |
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They're all worried about this giant puritan shark. It's actually not puritan.
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Dr. Harp, American History
Grove City, ,
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submitted: October 31, 2009 |
about the movie Jaws-I'm not sure what we would have done without that qualification. I may have actually thought the shark was bfs with John Winthrop or something.
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| Rating: unrated |
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I realize it's a lot like American Idol. No it's not. Scratch that. Don't write that in your notes.
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Dr. Harp, American History
Grove City, ,
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submitted: October 31, 2009 |
elections in the Puritan churches
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| Rating: unrated |
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I broke it in half. Just like the Russian people…
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Dr. Wyneken, 20th Century Russian History
Grove City, ,
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submitted: October 31, 2009 |
He accidentally broke a piece of chalk. I have no idea how the two things relate...
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| Rating: unrated |
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It's kinda like a big mac. But completely different.
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Dr. Wyneken, 20th Century Russian History
Grove City, ,
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submitted: October 31, 2009 |
talking about Lenin's tomb
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| Rating: unrated |
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I was the butt of every homosexual joke. No pun inten- No, pun intended.
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Dr. Bibza, Old Testament
Grove City, ,
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submitted: October 31, 2009 |
about a construction job he had in college
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| Rating: unrated |
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You heard that it was said “do not murder” but I tell you if your roommate is bugging you, blow the sucker away.
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Dr. Bibza, Old Testament
Grove City, ,
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submitted: October 31, 2009 |
an example of what a contradiction between the old and new testament would look like.
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| Rating: unrated |
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I'm just trying to imagine your life experience with semen.
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Brett Williams, Anthropology-Taboos
American University, Washington, DC
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submitted: October 27, 2009 |
Crazy hippie professor discussing taboos around bodily fluids.
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| Rating: 8 |
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What is the proper method for sucking?
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Prof. Scott Mellor, 235 Lit Trans
UW Madison, Madison, WI
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submitted: October 26, 2009 |
He was talking about papers, and how you can't just tell someone that theirs sucks. You have to be more detailed.
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| Rating: unrated |
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The process of learning science involves being lied to less and less. Unfortunately, this is a Freshman level class -- so pretty much everything I'm telling you here is a lie. However there are two main differences between my lies and the lies you heard in high school. (1) I admit they are lies, and (2) my lies are testable.
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Dr. Mike Larsen, PHYS 201
University of Nebraska at Kearney, Kearney, NE
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submitted: October 22, 2009 |
| Rating: 8 |
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There's a fine line between beautiful and slutty. Kind of like Angelina Jolie and Megan Fox.
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Will Adams, Greek and Roman Humanities
Valencia Community College, Orlando, Florida
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submitted: October 22, 2009 |
He was talking about how even though Aphrodite is commonly associated with being the goddess of beauty, Hera was really the most beautiful goddess while Aphrodite was more sexy.
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| Rating: unrated |
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You see when they say "dying" in the madrigals at this time, it meant "to orgasm"... so he really did want to die all day.
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Leta Miller, Music 11A
UCSC, Santa Cruz, CA
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submitted: October 21, 2009 |
while we were talking about some of the first madrigals.
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| Rating: unrated |
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I tried telling somebody I was a philosopher once. And he replied, 'well I'm a Presbyterian."
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Wade Robison, Intro to Ethics
Rochester Institute of Technology, Rochester, NY
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submitted: October 20, 2009 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"Write something that you would have liked to have had when you fist approached these tasks (if you actually _like_ the Unix man pages for learning new things, then pretend you're "normal" and write something a little more user friendly).
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Phil White, Professional Communications
Rochester Institute of Technology (RIT), Rochester, New York
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submitted: October 20, 2009 |
On the instructions for a User Documentation assignment.
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| Rating: unrated |
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*with two girls as a demonstration*
If the centriole is over here, we pull the sister chromatids just fine. But what if the centriole was up here? *tugs on girls hoodies* We end up pulling their tops off.
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Sandi Connelly, Gen Bio 1
Rochester Institute of Technology, Rochester, NY
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submitted: October 20, 2009 |
Derobing students: a great way to teach mitosis.
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| Rating: unrated |
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Referring to photoshop...... Brightness contrast tool, thats a blunt shovel i like my victims dead a lot faster.
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Christine Flavin, AD417 Photography Seminar
Norther Michigan University, Marquette, MI
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submitted: October 19, 2009 |
When you have had a Professor for so long they stop thinking about what they say to you.
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| Rating: unrated |
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"We do have a few faculty members that still insist on using a text-based browser... They load pages faster because they don't need to worry about images, and they believe it helps them get straight to the core of the information. These are people who have PhDs in Library Sciences, so..."
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Sean Boyle, Intro to Multimedia
Rochester Institute of Technology, Rochester, NY
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submitted: October 15, 2009 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"Is that a diary..? I'm probably in it. From the beginning of the semester -- 'That bastard! I hate his guts'!"
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Ed Acuna, Basic Illustration
Austin Community College, Austin, TX
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submitted: October 14, 2009 |
Haha this is especially funny because it was so uncharacteristic of him to swear...
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| Rating: unrated |
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"I've never been sad."
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Ed Acuna, Basic Illustration
Austin Community College, Austin, TX
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submitted: October 14, 2009 |
And then he recalled the one time in his life when he was sad, and told us about when he took some medication in order not to become sea-sick on a trip... and it made him gloomy.
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| Rating: unrated |
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"A lazy eye is better than a lazy body!"
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Ed Acuna, Basic Illustration
Austin Community College, Austin, TX
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submitted: October 14, 2009 |
| Rating: unrated |
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"Can I erase this? Because it's wrong."
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Ed Acuna, Basic Illustration
Austin Community College, Austin, TX
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submitted: October 14, 2009 |
| Rating: 7 |
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"The technical term for this function is fucked up slinky"
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Mr. larsen, Calculus 3
SMC, Dowagic, MI
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submitted: October 10, 2009 |
He's a Calculus teacher and he was talking about a helix in 3-d space.
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| Rating: unrated |
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Teacher: "As an example: I pull up on the chalkboard and it moves up" and this happens. "But if I pull on it," and she does. "I doesn't move."
Me: "I would have laughed so hard if the board had fallen."
Teacher: "I wouldn't. It's heavy, I'd hope you'd all call the cops!"
Me: "But it would be perfect with all the problems you've had."
Teacher: *shrugs and goes to write something on the board*
*light bulb falls off the chalk-board and nearly hits the teacher*
Class: *starts laughing hysterically*
Me: "I'M SORRY!"
Teacher: *glares*
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Prof. Sonya Bahar, Basic Physics 1012
University of Missouri- St. Louis, St. Louis, Missouri
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submitted: October 8, 2009 |
Okay we were talking about work and it's relation to force and direction, and the chalkboard moves up and down on a rolly-thing, and it has been giving us problems ever since the first day of class. EX: none of the lights working, half of the lights working, a cover on one of the lights falling off, an extra projector sheet falling on top of it and onto the stage, etc.
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| Rating: 6.5 |
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Another example of a ritual is the presentation of a bride and groom at the beginning of a wedding reception... I don't remember how they do it, exactly. I've been to many weddings, but I'm usually drunk by that point.
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Kathryn Lofton, Sexuality and Religion
Yale University, New Haven, CT
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Comments? Add
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submitted: October 7, 2009 |
| Rating: unrated |
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