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Student:"This is exciting"
Prof:"Wow, if this excites you then you have had a really boring life"
Prof. Maricak, Vis Com
Lawrence Tech, Southfeild, MI

Comments? Add or View (3) submitted: December 1, 2005
Rating: 7.5

"It's sad that when we talk about the Madonna people nowadays don't think of the Virgin Mary but of the sleezey no good pop singer"
George H. Cassar, Western Civilization to 1647 (101)
Eastern Michigan University, Ypsilanti, Michigan

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 2, 2005
Rating: 6

"If there ever was a great waste of time and manpower, it would have to be the pyramids. One wonders what on earth they were thinkign when they built those"
George H. Cassar, Western Civilization to 1647 (101)
Eastern Michigan University, Ypsilanti, Michigan

Comments? Add or View (4) submitted: December 2, 2005
Rating: 3

Cassar: "The Mona Lisa, and I don't mean the popular song. ANy of you know who sang that? One of my favourite singers. You might know his daughter. you know people always say to her 'You sing well, but not as well as your father.' Anyone know who I'm talking about?"
Student 1: "Elvis Presley?"
Cassar: "No, no, I'm not fond of Elvis at all"
Student 2: "Led Zeppilin."
Cassar: "Nope, hahaha, Try again"
Student 3: "Nat King Cole"
Cassar: "That'a girl!"
George H. Cassar, Western Civilization to 1647 (101)
Eastern Michigan University, Ypsilanti, Michigan

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 2, 2005
Rating: 2

"Michelangelo liked to paint and sculpt the mucsular male nude, and I wont go into detail as to why, and Titian preferred redish/blonde women. If Titian were here today he'd probably hit on you."
George H. Cassar, Western Civilization to 1647 (101)
Eastern Michigan University, Ypsilanti, Michigan

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 2, 2005

Lecturing to the class on artists, then turning to a light red headed girl in the frton row for the latter statement. Think of the awkwardness of being semi hit on by a 70+ year old prof.
Rating: 10

Someone asked me what we eat in Turkey for Thanksgiving. He was an idiot, so I told him, "Americans."
Vehbi Paksoy, Calculus II
Pomona College, Claremont, CA

Comments? Add or View (2) submitted: December 3, 2005

He's Turkish.
Rating: 10

And I'll leave this as an exercise that I know no one is going to do-- but it gets it off my conscience.
Dr. John Beachy, 620 Topics in Algebra: Homological Algebra
Northern Illinois University, DeKalb, IL

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 4, 2005
Rating: unrated

Acording to Aquinas you shouldnt really feel pain. for example lets say im in a parking garage and someone took a bat out of their car and BAM hit me right in the knee. and i go HA! little did he know i was on oppium, horine, crack, pot, codine...
, Philosophy 101
, ,

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 4, 2005
Rating: unrated

Sometimes your looking so hard for the bird you just miss the fish
Luthold, ad 301
northren michigan U, marquette, MI

Comments? Add or View (2) submitted: December 5, 2005
Rating: unrated

"You have all seen the commercial for viagra right? We you know how they have that disclaimer that says if you have an erection for more than 48 hours see a doctor? I know all the guys right now are thinking to themselves, ohh thats easy, I can do that, but I've got news for you: that's what we call an outlier!"
Mr. DiCarlucci, AP Statistics
Ossining High School, Ossining, NY

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 6, 2005

The coolest teacher in the world
Rating: unrated

So, what do you obtain when you have a chain of a baryum atom and two sodium atoms? A snack.
Dr. Lynn Myhichuk, Chem 102
University of Regina, Regina, SK

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 6, 2005

BaNaNa --> Periodic symbols for these two elements... Loved this prof!
Rating: 10

You got your four food groups: Beer, toilet paper, and cigarettes.
Dr. Michael Dzanko, Comp 101
Ashland University, Ashland, Ohio

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 6, 2005

He was talking about how old people were complaining in his home town that the college students don't contribute to the local economy.
Rating: unrated

"If you are smart, you might be able to cheat Ganesan. If you are not so smart, Ganesan will let you slide by."
Dr. Sengoda Ganesan, MEE 220
Northern Illinois University, DeKalb, IL

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 6, 2005

On up comming test
Rating: unrated

"Wow, teaching out of the book is quite easy, maybe I should do it more often!"
Dr. Sengoda Ganesan, MEE 220
Northern Illinois University, ,

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 6, 2005
Rating: unrated

If you want to have sex, just add another table.
Joel Weinstein,
Northeastern University, Boston, MA

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 7, 2005

When talking about loading databases into memory.
Rating: unrated

Don't jump! It's not worth it! Besides, we're on the first floor.
David Massey, Calculus II
Northeastern University, Boston, MA

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 7, 2005

Said when the professor saw the student leaning out the window to prop it open with a book.
Rating: 10

For a change why don't you 'come-on' to me?
Shamim Idris,
Lawrence School, Sanawar, , HP

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 9, 2005

In reply to a girl in the class who always said "Oh, come on...", when he announced his notorious surprise tests.
Rating: unrated

I don't know how you are with your recreational drugs, but I know for me, a change in the mixture is often required at the end of the semester
Dr. Sharon Johnson, Admin Policy and Strategy
Cedarville, Cedarville, OH

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 9, 2005
Rating: 10

Old Norse- I'm teaching a language course that you can take so you can learn to speak like an elf.
Dr. Lee Fratantuono, Myth, Legend, and Folklore
Ohi Wesleyan University, Delaware, OH

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: December 9, 2005

In reference to Norse mythology
Rating: 10

"Absolute value is forbidden. Absolute value is a pointy thing. Math people don't like pointy things. So what do we do. We smooth it!"
Dr. M. V. Moorthy, MA115- Statistics 1
Boston University, Boston, MA

Comments? Add or View (2) submitted: December 10, 2005

Why we don't use absolute value the chi squared test....
Rating: unrated

Dr. Moorthy: "Relative error. What is that?"
Wise ass kid: "When the wrong uncle comes to dinner"
::class laughs::
Dr. Moorthy: "I don't get it"
Dr. M. V. Moorthy, MA115- Statistics 1
Boston University, Boston, MA

Comments? Add or View (2) submitted: December 10, 2005

Oh language barrier...
Rating: unrated

Mesopotamian Kings: All around swell guys sacking your cites
Michael Danti, Archaeology 101
Boston University, Boston, MA

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 10, 2005

The heading on one of the power points...
Rating: unrated

"Remember the Inca don't have horses...they're not gonna mount their llamas"
Michael Danti, Archaeology 101
Boston University, Boston, MA

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 10, 2005

--talking about how the Spanish went after the Inca and out numbered them by means of armor, guns, and horses...
Rating: unrated

Arnold we like your movies, we don't mind your acting, we even like your genetalia; but we think that maybe you should chose a different occupation than politics.
Dr. Szabados, Introduction to Philosophy
University of Regina, Regina, Saskatchewan

Comments? Add or View (2) submitted: December 10, 2005
Rating: unrated

"Did anyone play miniature golf this morning? No? OK, then you need a pencil."
Dr. Peter K. Davies, CHEM 101
University of Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, PA

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: December 10, 2005

Before handing out course evaluations, which need to be answered with No. 2 pencils (like the SAT).
Rating: 9.5

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