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"I realize there are two types of students, those who care and those who don't. For those of you who do care..."
Dr. Tom Co, Process Control
Michigan Tech, Houghton, MI

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 16, 2004
Rating: unrated

"So this is me...and this is you taking a test...and this is me holding a pitchfork"
Dr. Jason Keith, Transport/Unit Operations II
Michigan Tech, Houghton, MI

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 16, 2004

He likes to draw pictures. His idea of what a psi looks like.
Rating: unrated

"The next prize I found in the parking lot of the bowling alley. Be happy you didn't get that one."
Dr. Jason Keith, Transport/Unit Operations II
Michigan Tech, Houghton, MI

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 16, 2004

He likes to give out really bad prizes in class for answering questions correctly.
Rating: 9

"So you should take this semipermable membrane with you if your boat ever sinks in the ocean. You could either dilute the sharks or at least hit them over the head with it."
Dr. Jason Keith, Transport/Unit Operations II
Michigan Tech, Houghton, MI

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 16, 2004

He tried for five minutes to tell a joke that made the class laugh. Two of us laughed. He said "Thank you". The rest of the class laughed.
Rating: unrated

"That's a sports update. Weather, we already talked about that. Now back to permeation systems."
Dr. Jason Keith, Transport/Unit Operations II
Michigan Tech, Houghton, MI

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 16, 2004

Said in a newscaster voice after commenting on how his comments manipulate the weather and the Red Wings.
Rating: unrated

"I don't want to manipulate students into wanting to learn things."
Dr. Tom Co, Process Control
Michigan Tech, Houghton, MI

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 16, 2004

While discussing that the final exam would be before classes were over...
Rating: unrated

Any graph with at most 6 vertices is 6-colorable by the "duh" method. If you can't 6-color a 4-vertex graph, then I'm sorry. You're in the wrong course.
Andy Niedermaier, Math 55 (discrete math)
Harvey Mudd College, Claremont, CA

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 16, 2004

A graph theory lecture. (Andy is a guest-lecturing student.)
Rating: 8

When I see code with 4 or 5 special cases collapse into one sequence with no special cases ... ahhh (*shivers*) ... I'd say it's better than sex, but it isn't.
Ken Reek, C for C++ Programmers
Rochester Institute of Technology, Rochester, New York

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 15, 2004
Rating: unrated

Tomorrow's exam is going to be a mixed bag.
Ron Mauno, Water and Wastewater Technology
Michigan Tech University, Houghton, MI

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: April 15, 2004
Rating: 3.66667

They could be singing the grocery list, but you could still tell they've completely fallen for each other.
Alton Tompson, Campus Concert Band
Michigan Tech University, Houghton, MI

Comments? Add or View (2) submitted: April 14, 2004

talking about when people sing in 3rds in musicals
Rating: 7

(After making a mistake) Pay no attention to the ranting man!
Dr. Bates, Advanced Logic 454
Stetson University, DeLand, FL

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 14, 2004
Rating: unrated

When in doubt, mumble and make Russian-sounding noises
Dr. Denner, Russian 102
Stetson University, DeLand, FL

Comments? Add or View (3) submitted: April 14, 2004
Rating: 6.5

*handing a student back a badly marked-up test* You owe me a red pen!
Dr. Denner, Russian 102
Stetson University, DeLand, FL

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 14, 2004
Rating: 9

Bill: That's part of my job as choir director. To confuse people. Convince.
Student: Freudian slip!
Bill Cutter, Concert Choir
MIT, Cambridge, MA

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: April 13, 2004

On getting the choir to accept that the extremely dissonant chords in Stravinsky's Mass are correct.
Rating: unrated

You know.....there are such things as stupid questions.
John Weld, US History: Industrial America
Kirkwood Community College, Cedar Rapids, Iowa

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 12, 2004
Rating: 10

So, as you can imagine, there is excellent opportunity for gonadal exposure.
Kimberlee Kearfott, NERS 250
University of Michigan, Ann Arbor, Michigan

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 11, 2004

While discussing a radiograph machine positioned around waist level to view one's feet.
Rating: unrated

So there are 20 to 30 carcinogens in a cigarette. So every time you smoke, it's like taking a multivitamin.
Professor Kimberlee Kearfott, NERS 250
University of Michigan, Ann Arbor, MI

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 8, 2004

This was said while discussing radionuclides found in cigarette carcinogens.
Rating: 10

Honey, ugliness knows no day of the week.
Dr. Weiner, Pathology
Arizona School of Massage Therapists, Tempe, AZ

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 8, 2004

Long story, but it was really funny.
Rating: 1

The pursuit of perfection is neurotic
C. Pitman, A.P. English Literature
Lyman High School, Longwood, FL

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 8, 2004
Rating: 4

The lecture is an authoritarian form of education.
Dr. William Nylen, Comparative Politics
Stetson University, DeLand, FL

Comments? Add or View (1) submitted: April 8, 2004
Rating: unrated

"this is a one ruble bill [Russian currency], and its worth less than the slide it's produced on."
Dr. Marples, HIST 322: Russia in the 20th Century
University of Alberta, Edmonton, Alberta

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 8, 2004
Rating: 1

Lord God, who at the feast of Belshaazar inspired the prophet Daniel to read and interpret the writing on the wall, look with compassion upon those who seek to understand the threefold Trinity of Cayley-Klein plane geometries and to find models of them in Your creation.  Do not abandon them to the powers of darkness, but reissue to this LCD projector Your primal command: "Let there be light."
Paul Bamberg, Classical Geometry
Harvard University, Cambridge, MA

Comments? Add or View (5) submitted: April 8, 2004

Blessing an overhead projector that wouldn't turn on.
Rating: 9.09091

When I learned logic, we didn't even have universal generalization.
Dr. Bates, Advanced Logic 453
Stetson University, DeLand, FL

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 7, 2004
Rating: 9

When under attack- deny reality!
Dr. Denner, Russian 102
Stetson University, DeLand, Fl

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 7, 2004

Said in response to a student who was blatantly reading for another class, and when asked if she was, looked at him in the eyes and said "no."
Rating: unrated

"This is an axon. Its job is to puke out neurotransmitters onto the dendrites."
Gary Laugel, Psych 102
WSU, Pullman, WA

Comments? Add or View (0) submitted: April 7, 2004
Rating: unrated

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